CXIII Rex A first look through the smoke

Government regulation can spur new business: just think, without DC's ban on fully nude dancers, we'd be without our burgeoning stripper clothes industry! For a lux smoking lounge born of Virginian legislation, check out CXIII Rex.

Built by the Landini Brothers team to curb smoking-customer loss after the '09 ban, Rex's a just-opened, members-only cigar temple rocking a walnut n' marble bar, original wood beams from an old tobacco warehouse, and a super high end chandelier crafted from Murano glass and Swarovski crystals, all stuffed into a space previously occupied by an art gallery which apparently wasn't raking in the Monet. Things are kept un-gross with "a 100% in and out" ventilation system (most cigar bars are 60%/40%) which sucks up smoke from stogies like the well-bodied Padron 1964 Anniversary Series, their Rocky Patel CXIII Rex signature joint, and the Ecuadorian wrapper/Dominican tobacco Ashton VSG with a "medium-to-full body", just like yours after eating tapas. Un-puffed awesomeness includes rentable iPads for working/app'ing, a 250-bottle wine cellar with separate AC, all types of high end liquors and five still TBD signature cocktails, service by an all-female waitstaff, and a brace of international phones: great for calling a country where it's still acceptable to have all-female waitstaffs.

The first 200 peeps to join'll get a comped private humidor locker -- perfect, as your other locker's already brimming with locally-sourced, artisan thongs.