Having scruff makes you feel tough, but shaving on Wednesday to achieve ideal ruggedness by Friday undermines everything manly about your supposedly lax grooming habits. Abolish fussy advance shearing forever with the Forfex Pro trimmer.

The FPT is a mini facial trimmer whose default and only option is "Proto-Beard". The resulting stubble is short enough to be considered well-groomed, but rough enough that you can still fearlessly lie about riding a motorcycle. And as if designed for Lorenzo Lamas himself, the FPT is compact, cordless, and lightweight -- so wherever you go, you can quickly de-ape before doling out renegade justice.

But just because it's easy to use, don't be tempted to run it over your more wrinkly body parts. One nightmarish slip and that mangy brown neck wreath will be the only masculine part left of you.