Even if your job requires a cookie-cutter wardrobe, wearing Tweety Bird neckwear on Taco Friday is a pathetic way to fight corporate dronery. Enjoy soul-saving stylishness by throwing on a "Ties Suck" tie.

TSTs are the handiwork of GiftsforEngineers.com, a company that generally caters to guys who spent high school trapped inside lockers and weekends playing Oregon Trail. These 100% silk binary beauties come in blue, black, or red, and are patterned front and back with screen-printed 0s and 1s. To higher-ups, this'll seem a meaningless, if elegant texture, but you and the robot they're training to replace you will know that code actually spells "Ties Suck" -- a joke that'll crack up the IT department so much they'll stop reading your personal e-mail.

Of course this is a trivial subversion of fascist dress requirements, but it's nevertheless a small step toward reclaiming individuality: a fact that the Splonk 3000 won't overlook during happy hour as it drunkenly points out the irony that speaking like a machine finally made you feel like your own man.