There's no finer art than the telling of a ribald sex story -- and nothing worse than a lout who thinks he's mastered that art by merely sharing that, one time, he enjoyed The Ultimate (penis-in-vagina). To hear naked tales told right, hit "Stripped Stories", a monthly showcase starting up tomorrow night at Mo Pitkin's.

SS is hosted by Giulia Rozzi and Margot Leitman, a pair of successful comediennes who also boast tragicomic experience in the ways of love. Besides GR and ML, typical shows will feature a comedian, a writer or musician, and an ordinary, non-performer type coached by the pros to rehash a magical evening of pathos and genitalia. The shows are centered on themes, like tomorrow's aptly titled "Embarrassing". The tentative lineup: A torrid night on the Jersey shore. A torrid night getting caught masturbating. How to break off a relationship with a redneck (apparently, with a restraining order). And of course, a trip to Planned Parenthood with a small wee-wee'd man.

Would-be storytellers: the non-performer slot is open for future shows, so if your man-bits have ever been to a bad place (or been rudely booted from a good place), email your saga to the hostesses and they'll consider its worthiness. If they decide your sordid episode has comedic merit, they'll help you tighten it into 7 minutes of brutally frank hilarity -- honing your stage delivery, and improving the odds that your past misadventures will soon help you get laid again.