While it's understandable to want to look good, it's the ability to pull off measured hideousness that separates the men from the cringing fancy boys. To dress perfectly badly on the cheap, check out 1UglyShirt.com.

"Ugly is the new black," claims e-store owner Skeet McAuley, who rates 1US's assortment of new and vintage tees, tuxes, and other assorted steez on a "Fugly Meter". Thanks to relationships with charity-supporting thrift shops, Skeet culls out the crappiest of the crop for loving repair, cleaning, measurement, and ranking. The result's seven decades worth of majestic sartorial gaffes, like a $10 black-and-white polyester abortion intended to be a sweater, or a $20 gold-trimmed track jacket that'll keep your temperature regulated as you desperately evade a fashion SWAT team with orders to kill, then burn.

As if quality awfulness weren't enough, you'll also be supporting the various organizations benefiting from the stores that supply 1US' secondhands. Plus, you'll be promoting environmentalism by keeping these hideous things on your body, and out of the landfills.