Today's self-involved bars concern themselves only with their own ridiculous ideas: from hoity-toity membership clubs that disallow cell phones, to places insistent that you "pay for stuff". For a bar that cares about ridiculous ideas, check out The Fifth.

From The Woods/The Well guys and located in the former Studio Suites space, Fifth's a 70s-inspired bar with a vintage "customer comes first" philosophy. First, they give you three distinct rooms/vibes to choose from: the boozy main bar, with flatscreens, stained glass, and a redwood bartop lifted from now-defunct Daddy's; a lounge with cheesily soothing burnt-orange and Aztec wallpaper; and a gameroom w/ pool and two tabletop video games loaded with Pac Man, Centipede, and Galaga (a great baby name that's shockingly still there for the taking). Taking your wishes to a higher level, booze offerings are predicated almost entirely on customer demand: initially, they'll stock just the essential bourbons, vodkas, and bottled beers, and add premiums and specialty cocktails only upon request from regulars (though being personally known to the staff may overwhelm your desire to ask for Hpnotiq).

Customer control's also extended to the jukebox: they're starting out with 100 mostly-rock records (Weezer, Johnny Cash, Skynyrd, etc), but're taking requests for substitutions, and'll even consider demos from regular patrons' bands -- allowing for the most ridiculous idea of all, that anybody wants to hear your rendition of "Can I Borrow a Feeling".