“99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” is a mysterious tune, begging questions like “how are these beers attached to that wall?”, and “why am I passing these beers around on the way back from Epcot?” Get out of town and down 99+1 brews all by yourself, at the Palm Beach Craft Beer Festival this Saturday.

Everything you need to drink/ know/ drink:

• 30 breweries will pour unlimited 5oz-ers, including Due South, Tequesta, Shipyard, Victory, Swamp Ape, Cigar City, and Oskar Blues, which you'd have too if you lived in a garbage can surrounded by terrifying Muppets.
• Think you make better beer than all those guys? Well, no, you don't, but you can still try to prove it by having your home-brewed sixer judged by legit tasters like "The Beer Guy" (that's a real guy!) for the chance to win $500.
• Improve your stamina by nabbing eats like PS561's ridiculous hot dogs, plus funnel cakes and Italian sausage sandos from Chappy's.
• Non-beer entertainment includes hot air balloon rides, dunk tanks, and a surfing simulator, which is pretty swell, unlike that pun.
• General admission tickets get you in the door at 4p, while VIP jobs mean an extra hour of sipping, access to a cigar garden, plus a t-shirt and beer stein -- meaning you can take one down, then not pass it around, and just drink another giant beer.