Cinco de Cinco You'd be loco not to drink these Portland favorites. And take a Tour de Tequila by checking out Margs Across America .

Cinco de Mayo can be a little nutty, even by Portland standards. To help sort through the chaos and get to its heart, we enlisted experts from lauded nature publication National Tequilagraphic Margazine to take us on a highly scientific tour through the city -- from the tranquil forests of Mt. Tabor to the Devil's lair -- in search of the city's best margaritas, so as to better understand the nature of the species.

Oh, and there are boobs.