When your athletic abilities fade, in order to make people care that you're still alive you must develop other skills, like lovable cleverness. For a brand that gets clever with sports, check out the latest from No Mas.

Named for Duran's infamous quit job against Leonard, No Mas pumps out sports-themed clothing -- and, now, accessories -- that cunningly celebrate sports' all-time highs and lows, many of which involve highs. The latest: satiny "Finisher" duffel bags hand-fashioned from Mas's personal collection of 200+ Starter jackets, including Midwest clubs like the Bulls, Bears, Cubs, White Sox, Wolverines, Buckeyes, Browns, Vikings, and Bucks -- recalling the bygone glory of Brad Lohaus's feathery jumper and fading blond locks. Newly unleashed tees and hoodies include a cartoon of Youngstown's favorite son Ray "Boom Boom" Mancini being fed grapes by a Caesars Palace hottie; a light-bulb nodding to the first Ebbets Field under-the-lights baseball game (1938), in which the Reds' Johnny Vander Meer threw his 2nd consecutive no-hitter; and black-lettered "Re-instate 'Shoeless' Joe Jackson" (even though he's dead, he can still hit better than Nick Swisher).

Non-regional awesomeness is highlighted by a "Tecmo Bo" showcasing Jackson's 8-bit breakaway speed, a black "Tyson vs Givens" hoodie, and a ganja green "Chief & Chong" number featuring the FedEx package that sealed Robert Parish's fate -- though you can't blame 00, 'cause when your high school friendships fade, you've got to develop other ways to get your drugs.

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Check all the fresh oldness at NoMas-NYC.com