Whether you're ditching work for a Tuesday Cubs game, ditching your girlfriend for a Saturday Cubs game, or ditching Jesus for a Sunday Cubs game, you're gonna need some kind of excuse. Here to help, Urban Joe's "Style and an Old Style".
Stumbling distance from Wrigley, Joe's a six-chair, guys-only barbershop decked out with a pair of flatscreens, wall-mounted guitars, and bleacher-style waiting-area seating; this baseball season, they're offering a discounted, beer-addled deal good 'til the first pitch of all 81 regular-season Cubbies home games -- so later when you're asked where you've been, your well-coiffed handsomeness'll be all the proof you need. With no appointment necessary, pop in for a $15 "no gimmicks, no nonsense" haircut (a 25% discount), and receive a gratis 16oz Old Style tallboy, putting you well on the way to achieving a State of Mark Grace. Upping your buzz, they're giving a second brew to anyone whose ID-validated name matches that day's Cubs starting pitcher -- so all those not named Carlos, Ryan, Rich, or Sean, should promptly change their names, as should all those named Ted, despite the opportunity for more beer.
Unlike its brother Halo [For Men] salons, Joe offers nothing but haircuts, so you'll have to get your waxing done someplace else -- so if you return to responsibility sporting an immaculate groin, you'll once again need some kind of excuse.