Paul Pape Custom Carbonites

Han Solo may have had the balls to totally big time his girlfriend as he was being frozen in carbonite, but if he truly had balls he would have emerged with them out, to totally big time Jabba. Do it yourself the way he should have, thanks to Paul Pape Custom Carbonite.

From a hobbyist in Nebraska who's built a career designing furniture, stop-motion animation figures, and even a set for an Alicia Keys' tour (yay!), PP'll sculpt anyone into a mini frozen carbonite replica so they "can be like their favorite outer space bounty hunter", which has been Greedo ever since it turned out he shot first. Submit a photo of whomever you'd like "encased", and PP'll do up your model to include everything from the clothes you're in, to your choice of position, which in his words can be either "the classic pose, or something more whimsical", so...pile driver? The cast's hand-sculpted into a 2"x4" brick of "carbonite", actually a mixture of plastic and Super Sculpey he notes is not edible, disappointing to anyone who was really hoping to find themselves encased in carbonara-nite.

Best of all, each one'll set you back just $50, though if you think having a model of yourself frozen in carbonite will make you big time, you'll probably end up Solo.