Nation

Wardrobe staples benefit from custom steezing, but in spite of their ubiquity, there's one piece of buckling midsection gear that rarely gets such treatment: man-girdles! And to a lesser extent, belts! For you-designed waist whips, hit Leather Man Ltd.

Around since the 60s and still stubbornly refusing to farm out their labor, LML lets you mash up a mind-boggling array of base fabrics and graphic "motifs" to craft your ideal belt, then fabricates it for you at a price so low, only a company outsourcing belt-design to its customers could afford it. To take advantage of 200+ motifs, start with either a standard notch-buckle affair (avail in 24 waffled-cotton base colors or brown leather), or a two-ring loop-back adding 16 more nylon hue choices; next, overlay your graphic theme, with options like seafaring vessels (schooners to power boats), game animals, various sporting equipment, flags, and even dinosaurs, forcing former Red Sox slugger Carl Everett to deny the existence of your belt. Beyond motifs, you can also bestow a cotton base with any of five madras fabrics, monogram 18 different felted-cotton surcingles, or grab a leather number w/ 33 stamped designs heavy on sport fish, from bass, to marlin, to wahoo, to the most deadly catch of all: sweet, delicious manatee.

If you don't wear pants, LML slings other man-goods like custom-strapped sandals (w/ the same 200+ motifs), a canvas tote w/ one corner adorned by a motif ribbon, and even pooch collars and harnesses, because nothing attracts women more than a dog with a matching mutt-girdle.