Because after our summer scorcher defection to John Candyland doesn't sound like such a Nutty idea, hop the 3.5hr flight to Snow Village Canada. Running in Montreal from Jan 6th-end of March, it's a replica of the city's most gorgeous parts, made out of goddamned ice. Ice! Just some of the frozen accomplishments:

Ice Hotel: "Live as an Inuit" in an actual igloo, grab a "standard" (still ice) room glowing with eerie lights embedded into the hard-pack, or spring for a "prestige suite" with multicolored glowing sculptures carved into the walls. All rooms come with a comp cocktail and thermal blankets that can keep you cozy to past -22deg F, hopefully preventing you from also dying as an Inuit.

Pommery Restaurant/Amarula Bar: The 60-seat Pommery igloo claims to be the first ice resto in N. America, and even the tables & chairs are made of the stuff. The 250-seat Amarula's got an ice terrace overlooking the village, and the glassware's actually ice, too, so if you're ever going to reclaim your youth by doing a Flaming Dr. Pepper, for god's sake don't do it now.

Igloofest: Overlapping with the Village is a 5yr-old melee of electronica & dubstep that, thanks to 60000 people over three chaotic weekends, has become big enough to require a new outdoor home this year. As you tilt back sponsor-lager Sapporo and take in the "wacky ski suit competition", you'll thump to the sounds of acts you may or may not have heard of, from A-Trak, to Black Tiger Sex Machine -- and what's better than a sex machine made out of goddamned black tigers? Black tigers!