Behind the Bar: How to never wait for a drink again

It's been a question that's plagued man since the beginning of time (which was the name of a trendy club in, like, Bible times): How do you not stand like some chump at a bar, just waiting forever to be noticed, so you can order your can of Red Dog? Only bartenders know. So we asked them, and they told us so we could tell you. Happy never waiting in line again! Unless it's for Christopher Mintz-Plasse's autograph or something.