Next Friday, June 21st, you're gonna get to find out what it would be like to be Ferris Bueller and Parker Lewis combined when you embark on the Best Day of Your Life, a Thrillist-curated, sunrise-to-sunset exercise in non-stop awesome.
Once you've called in sick, you'll need to 1) print out this... printable itinerary, 2) make a note that drip coffee at Ascension and beer/donut bags at East Hampton Sandwich Co will be totally free, 3) find a friend who likes to wear a Detroit Red Wings jersey in public, 4) check out all the social action here, and 5) Danke Schoen us later.
6:20a: Wake up with the sun, and don't be so mean to your alarm clock today, since it's the Best Day of Your Life
Zero dark 30: Hit the Katy Trail for a run to get your blood flowing. Dodge bicyclists to boost your adrenaline levels.
Asscrack of dawn: Home for a shower. Belt out the "Dallas Texas, Hollywood" line from ZZ Top's "Tush".
Early morning: Head to Ascension at Hi Line and Oak Lawn in the Design District and sample the awesomeness of a $20k coffeemaker. If they're too full, backtrack up Oak Lawn just a bit and hit up Oak Lawn Coffee. Or, if you're starting your day further North, get over to FND for our Readers' Choice: Coffee House Cafe.
Post-breakfast breakfast: Go classic Dallas and hit up La Duni for ham & cheese Bizcocho while watching the poor shlubs on Oak Lawn head to/from meetings.
Noonish: Grab a seat at Klyde Warren Park and beam piteously at the traffic zooming underneath you.
It's time for lunch: Take advantage of that TollTag & head to NW Hwy for lunch at East Hampton Sandwich Company. Go for the fried chicken & Jack w/ jalapeno cream sauce… unless they're suddenly out of food, in which case, just one block North & one block West lies Hopdoddy Burger Bar. You're eating the Goodnight Burger.
Post-lunch: Hit up Top Golf over on Park Ln and work on your slice over a cocktail.
Early afternoon: Head back to Central and down to West Village to the Magnolia Theater to catch Brad Pitt's attempt at a post-zombie apocalypse movie.
3p, or, It's 5 o'clock somewhere, like Rio: Head NW on Blackburn, hang a left on Oak Lawn, and stop when you get to Meddlesome Moth; time to grab some Malt of the Earth. Too packed? The Grapevine Bar's a great place to let loose, and it's just about half a mile back on Oak Lawn.
You-time: You've been drinking, so a quick cab ride over to Victory Park means you can have a stogie custom-rolled while the 'tender shakes up a mojito at the Havana Social Club. If everyone near the AAC's feeling a little Cuban, kick back with a seriously fine selection in just a fraction of the time it takes you to smoke a cigar, at McKinney Ave's Up in Smoke.
Happy Hour: Cab it to Bar Belmont and booze up while toasting the worker bees downtown like it's National Pity Everyone Without a Day Off Day (it kinda is!). Patio all full? Head over to The Foundry, since it's not even a half mile up Ft. Worth Ave.
Din din, Morris: One last cab back to the Design District for a beautifully plated lamb loin with fried garlic and mint at FT33. Can't get a table? Take the Stemmons service road to Continental, then hang a right at Ross for dinner at Stephan Pyles. [ED NOTE: Definitely call ahead at either FT33 or Stephan Pyles for a reservation, or you might wind up at the Market Center Denny's.]
8:38p: Dusk means outdoor bar. Take Oak Lawn to Maple, then kick back and enjoy the great outdoors as the sun sets on the Best Day Of Your Life at the only jogging-/biking-/running trail-adjacent beer garden we've got: The Katy Trail Ice House. Be sure to make plenty of noise for those pesky Park Towers residents.