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Power-ranking DC's 8 best pizzas

Because, at a certain point in every man's life, he needs to know the eight best pizza places in his general vicinity, we scoured Cap City, ate, like, infinity pies, and faced the humiliation of having to wear elastic-waisted jeans, all in an effort to find DC's eight best pizzas. So, here they are:

Pete’s
8. Pete's
Friendship Heights
What you're ordering: New Haven, with local Chesapeake clams
Known as "APIZZA" and pronounced "ah-BEETZ," the thin-crust New Haven-style pie comes with ultra-fresh ingredients like those clams (in the water on Monday, on your pizza on Wednesday!), plus other organic and locally grown toppings. And don't sleep on the in-house sweet Italian sausage, made from scratch right in the kitchen, because it's a) excellent, and b) uncomfortable to sleep on.
Yelp!
7. &Pizza
H Street
What you're ordering: Farmer's Daughter, with spicy tomato, housemade mozzarella, hot sausage, farm eggs, spinach, Parimigiano Reggiano, and red pepper chili oil
After a huge success on H St, this Italian assembly line of pie might be the best deal in town, w/ huge rectangular pizzas for around $10 that get covered with specialties like mushroom truffle spread and farm eggs.
Matchbox
6. Matchbox
14th St
What you're ordering: Fire & Smoke, with fire-roasted red peppers, Spanish onions, chipotle peppers, tomato sauce, garlic puree, smoked Gouda, and fresh basil
With three DC locations, the vintage wood-firing pizza bistro brings the heat all over the district with pies like the aforementioned Fire & Smoke, which gets its name from the fire-roasted red peppers and smoking hot Rob Thomas chipotle peppers.
Leo Schmid
5. Etto
Logan Circle
What you're ordering: Alla Romana, w/ tomato, capers, olives, onions, anchovies, and mozzarella
Using a giant shipped-over Austrian mill, the old-fashioned shop churns out grain daily for their pie crusts, before tossing them in their wood-fired oven. And if you don't fill up on 'za, there's a spiced cookie shaped like a woman from an Italian legend who's got three breasts: two for milk and one for wine. Seriously. This is really a thing.
Graffiato
4. Graffiato
Chinatown
What you're ordering: Jersey Shore, with fried calamari, tomato, Provolone, cherry pepper aioli
Mike Isabella's first spot in Chinatown hides a huge oven behind a cinderblock bar, where you'll pull a chair up to watch them create unique pies like the cherry pepper aioli/Provolone/fried calamari "Jersey Shore", which will leave a much better taste in your mouth than anything the cast... er... MOVING ON!
Yelp! user Alicia G.
3. Seventh Hill
Eastern Market
What you're ordering: Seventh Street, with prosciutto, Parmesan, roasted red peppers, tomatoes
Using a wood-burning oven made from Rhone River stones because of their superior baking quality and uncanny wine-pairing suggestions, Seventh creates 15 gourmet numbers available in 8in or 12in and all named after surrounding DC hoods -- so if your heart is in Eastern Market, you can... well, get it.
Leo Schmid
2. Ghibellina
Logan Circle
What you're ordering: Bianca, with rapini, mozzarella, garlic, Calabrian chilies, fennel seed, Pecorino Romano
The Italian gastropub, from the owners of Acqua Al 2, keep things simple and authentic w/ seven Neapolitan styles tossed up by a trained pizzaiolo and finished off with toppings like Calabrian chilies, finnochiona, and mozzarella di Bufala.
2Amy’s Facebook
1. 2Amy's
Cleveland Park
What you're ordering: Margherita Extra, w/ tomato, mozzarella di Bufala, cherry tomatoes
Heard of it? No? Well, out-of-touch friend, just dial up your internet, jump on Altavista, and plug in 2Amy's.  The search results two minutes later (stop using Altavista!) will reveal that it's a Cleveland Park Neapolitan pie institution consistently decorated for having the best pies in town and formally recognized by the Italian government for its authenticity.
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1. Pete's - Tenleytown/Friendship Heights 4938-4940 Wisconsin Ave NW, Washington, DC 20016

Opening today, the second location of Pete's New Haven Style Apizza (pronounced ah-BEETS) has twice the seating (100 inside plus a 40+ patio) and double the beers on tap of its Columbia Heights location; they're also adding a selection of housemade gelato

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2. H & Pizza 1118 H St NE, Washington, DC 20002

This popular DC pizzeria is baking some of the best pies in the city and simultaneously giving your late-night slice conquests some legitimacy by also offering craft beers.

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3. matchbox 14th Street 1901 14th St NW , Washington, DC, DC 20009

matchbox's leviathan 14th Street location is built into an old bowling alley, and they're more then prepared to turn you into a ball. Three floors of "rustic vintage style" means original exposed girders, brushed metal fixtures, and a full-on a fire pit.

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4. Etto 1541 14th St NW, Washington, DC 20005

From the folks behind 2 Amys and Standard, this pizza place is old-fashioned in more than just its name -- Etto's using old-school tools, including a giant, wooden flour mill, to churn out delicious 'zas, breads, and pies.

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5. Graffiato 707 6th St, Washington, DC 20001

Opened by former "Top Chef" Mike Isabella, Graffiato is an innovative Italian eatery in Chinatown (yes, confusing). What's not confusing is the tastes or the fact that there is a ham bar where locally-cured meats are carved to perfection right in front of you. The open wooden bar-style kitchen allows you to converse with the chef as he kneads the dough for your personal wood-fired pie.

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6. SeventhHill 327 7th St SE, Washington, DC 20003

A small, black-and-white tiled, galley pizzeria lined with decorative wooden pizza peals and racked firewood, Hill's helmed by two intrepid Frenchmen who, in order to create truly epic pies, decided to import an oven made from prized Rhone River stones or

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7. Ghibellina 1610 14th St NW, Washington, DC, DC 20009

This "Italian gastropub" offers up 1.5kg steaks, wood-fired pizza, 20oz Italian drafts, and much more. Allied: Wash down that 1.5kg steak with some Smith & Forge, the hard cider that's built strong -- built from Apples and built to Refresh.

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8. 2 Amys 3715 Macomb St NW, Washington, DC 20016

Proving that they're all about authenticity, the two Amys behind 2 Amys in DC have committed to serving only D.O.C. (Italian-origin certified) ingredients in their awesome pizza pies.

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