What is the most “Chicago” way to die?

With the Willis Tower observation deck recently cracking and scaring the bejesus out of some tourists, it truly begs the question: what is the most authentically “Chicago” way to shuffle off this mortal coil? A few humble suggestions:

  • Get run over by a United Center Zamboni
  • A Bill Swerski Superfan-style heart attack
  • Accidentally ingest even the smallest amount of Chicago River water
  • Get pushed over the railing at Wrigley by a fan jumping after a foul ball
  • Losing the battle with a deep dish pizza food coma
  • Get crushed by the runaway Ferris wheel at Navy Pier
  • Slip and fall into a giant sausage grinder
  • Heartbreak over Hot Doug’s closing

How say you, internet? Drop us a line in the comments.