Over time, your mind can play tricks on you, which is why you should always check to make sure your shoelaces aren't tied together before walking anywhere. For a blog from a guy whose mind has a friend crouching down behind him, check Movies I Don't Remember.
Inspired by an "impressively inaccurate synopsis of Jurassic Park III", MIDR's a daily blog where the author briefly recaps old movies based entirely on the power of his memory, though Snap! would claim they've already got that. Choice mis-recollections include:
"Erika Eleniak jumps out of a cake, topless. Seagal might be a chef, and it's Die Hard on a boat -- but mainly what I remember is: Erika Eleniak jumps out of a cake, topless."
Tim Robbins is mentally handicapped and may have killed somebody's kid. Sean Penn yells a lot in the street. Eventually Tim Robbins probably has to be put down, like Lenny in Of Mice and Men. Lots of intense feeling, lots of yelling -- and I think there might be some kind of code being observed, like a code of the streets, or some kind of gang's code, or a code of brothers."
"Tom Cruise, in the title role, is a sports agent who's fallen on hard times, but Cuba Gooding Jr. is his ticket out. Tom Cruise has sex with a woman who says, "Never stop f***** me", and she's supposed to be bad. Also, there's some horrible little boy with glasses, although I have no idea how he factors into the plot."
Only after stringently taxing his Omega-3-starved brain for the vaguest of details, the guy pairs each carefully crafted synopsis with a still pic from the movie, thus shedding some light on what really happened (hint: your jerk mind just ordered you 70 extra-large pizzas).
Published: February 10, 2011 at 4:00am EST
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