Bayside! The UnMusical Like Saved by the Bell, but with more jokes about spanking it

Even if you've recently been trying to avoid Saturday morning dramas involving teenagers, pregnancy scares, and speed, you can still take that NYU frosh you're dating to Bayside! The UnMusical, which drops your favorite characters from "Saved by the Bell" (suck it, Tori!) in a completely campy, winsomely flawed, "edgy" production that isn't Spiderman: Turn Off the Dark. Conceived while the creators were "high on mushrooms", and definitely more enjoyable if you pop some yourself, some of the inappropriate-for-teenagers elements include:

• Slater battling with his perhaps-too-fervent love of singing... and dancing... and rainbow singlets... and Zack.
• A recreation of the leotard dance sequence performed by the Hot Sundaes (!), but with lyrics entirely about masturbation
• Screech played by a 41yr-old woman from Long Island who, "although raised an orthodox Jew... hopes to join the Hitler Youth some day".
• A subplot involving Mr. Belding possibly having murdered his wife, which was added because the "actor who plays him is creepy now".
• Lisa not realizing she's black until halfway through the show. Your move, dude from Scrubs!

But that's not all! As an added bonus, you can even stick around after the show's over to "sit on Kelly Kapowski's Lap", a situation that most people have been trying to avoid ever since The College Years.