thrillist

Run by a real-life fight choreographer and a dude who just really likes Star Wars (so clearly at some point he needed to learn to fight), GGK is an honest-to-Anakin lightsaber academy that holds weekly classes in a SOMA back-alley studio, where you'll learn how to correctly wield Jedi weaponry and recreate actual Episodic fight scenes, so bring an extra hand.

The every-Sunday classes are free your first time (then just $10-$15 thereafter), come with a gratis glowing "saber" to use for slicing open fat, smelly people during winter the entire first month, and include three hours of stretching (!), warm-ups (!!), saber flourishes, attacker/defender choreography, and end-of-class meditation complete with a recital of the Jedi Code (as if you need to be told not to talk about Lightsaber Class).

Cool stuff you'll learn while listening to their all-John Williams Pandora playlist: figure eights, behind-the-back transitions, dual-saber wielding, and attacks with a double saber staff, a superior weapon Darth Maul uses in the prequels, and which was totally explainably unavailable to dudes fighting in the postquels.

And since you're no doubt already thinking, "dude, I just wish they would be cool with me wearing my Jar Jar Binks costume", just know they are cool with it, because if you've got the balls to wear that, clearly, at some point, you had to learn how to fight.

Add this to My Thrillist

How could you not click this? No, seriously. How. Tell us.