Sometimes at night, when you're lying in your California King hammock with your on-and-off GF of seven weeks, do you ever secretly wish that you lived in Maryland? Unless you're former Governor Spiro T. Agnew, that answer is obviously a resounding "no", but that shouldn't stop you from eating all of the Old Line State's succulent blue crabs at The Blue Room's Blue Crab + Beer Fest next Thursday.

Held on their Kendall Square patio, Chef Robert "Wouldn't It Have Been More Awesome If My Parents Named Me Ulysses S." Grant is cooking an all-you-can-maw smorgasbord of crab, New England steamers, corn on the cob & potatoes, then throwing it all down on communal tables covered with paper so they don't have to watch you be disgusting. On top of that, they're pairing those delicious Sebastians from Little Mermaid with unlimited local brews, including Narragansett, Cambridge Brewing, and Pretty Things, aka everyone after unlimited local brews.

Tickets are $72 (tax and gratuity included!) and will sell out fast, so don't be a nattering nabob of negativity, and snag yours now.