Tom Aikens Poppa's got a brand new bag

For everyone except Katy Perry, re-branding is a wonderful way to start fresh, hence uberchef Tom Aikens' complete transformation of his eponymous chow-spot (once named the 8th best in the world), re-opening today, and touting a more "informal" (read: you can now afford it) atmosphere fleshed out by mixed oak tables and wall-slapped food quotes from the likes of Socrates and Miss Piggy, who would never tell any porkies.

Feasting now comes either a la carte or in 6/8/10-course tasters, with meat involving braised short ribs w/ "melting tendons" & bone marrow, piglet w/ roast gem & caramelized squid, and a pigeon consomme w/ truffle custard we can only pray isn't also Bird's.

The same oceans that have long filled man's heart with wonder now fill your belly with chorizo-baked cod w/ 24hr squid & cod soup, some juicy turbot covered in crisp chicken skin, and marinated diver scallops soaked in apple vinegar, and served with "acidulated apple": slices literally soaked in acid, so thank god the bill will jerk you back into reality...except now that it's cheaper, it won't. What a trip!

Equally mind-altering are the desserts, spanning candied beetroot w/ port syrup, a white chocolate creme w/ black pepper & pepper caramel, and carrot granite paired with pickled carrots & carrot juice, a threesome that provides more Firework than the ones enjoyed by a post-Perry Russell Brand.