Uptown Tavern Get Uptown to get down

From the Tavern-minded team behind Offshore, West Coast, TrueNorth, and like, at least two other taverns, Uptown's just popping open its Hillcrest doors, rocking a spacious streetside patio running the length of the joint, and an interior set up like a giant horseshoe centered around the bar, with a semi-covered, fireplace-laden back patio. Tapping Michael Soriano's mad design skills (he made Analog & Syrah look so damn cool), the interior gives off an unfinished, industrial vibe with lamps made from old metal water jugs, and walls dressed with pre-WWII NY Times articles for a look that people should start calling Prohibition Derelicte because it will catch on! Southern-leaning vittles include:

Bacon-Wrapped Dates: Like all good dates, these ones involve meat stuffing! Specifically chorizo, plus peppered bacon on the outside and a goat cheese mousse.

Jalapeno Cornbread: Before you go “oh sweet, cornbread” all sarcastic and kind of rude-like, take special note of the melted, smoked cheddar, fresh white corn, jalapenos, ginger, garlic, shallots, spiced honey, and the chef's momma's apple butter.

Albacore Chop Chop: Totally inappropriate to yell when ordering, this one involves raw tombo belly and seared loin, marinated peaches, jalapenos, and three kinds of bell peppers, and is spiced up with a ginger simple syrup and a strawberry/Sriracha “devil sauce”, aka what Mitt Romney calls coffee.

Chicken & Waffles: Making like Roscoe with more culinary flair, they're piling tempura-fried chicken tenders, maple syrup, and maple butter on top of housemade waffles infused with bacon and cheddar that, true to form, makes the whole deal taste money.

How does a 40-strong cocktail menu sound? If you said aloud to yourself, "Great!", then check out the video above to get the liquid lowdown from one very easy-on-the-eyes bartendress, and prepare to go in and tip her until you're the one who is derelicte.