thrillist

Until DC relaxes its stiflingly stringent policies on monkey butlers, you may as well impress guests at your party with crazy exotic caterers Tarsier, who're at least named for a primate (actually, the world's smallest).

Led by a former Occidental chef, the brand-new outfit wants to hook up your party with "postmodern Filipino" cuisine, focusing on "pulutan" street bites that're described as "food to pair with friends", so if you ever go to the Philippines and some creepy guy says "we'd love to have you for dinner!" and winks, don't go. Do, however, chow on:

Lechon Sliders: Roasted pork shoulder, crispy chicharron, sukang sili pickles, and Datu Puti aioli are stuffed in housemade "salty" rolls, so expect mad freshness.

Dinuguan Morcilla: A "handsome pretzel roll" gets served alongside Filipino blood sausage shmeared with chili slaw and Datu Puti mustard aioli, which they seem to puti on pretty much everything.

“Angry Adobo” Rolls: Pickled chilies and Datu Puti (!) sea salt chips are served alongside adobo-cooked poultry marinated for a "touch of fire", or what Johnny Blaze calls "a huge impediment to my love life".

Pancit Dumplings: Pan-fried bihon dumplings (more like bihon good!) burst with minced shrimp, chicken, and vermicelli, and're topped with braised pork and spicy fish.

And, if you'd like to try it before you buy it, rotating spots like Dunes and DC Brau will be offering the food on Saturdays, assuming you can break with your stringent monkey policy of hanging out at the Brass one.

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See just what Filipino street food looks like, at TarsierCatering.com