thrillist

Everyone dreams of how they'll blow the loot from their big payday, whether it's something joyfully frivolous (three months in the Bahamas!), or more adult and practical (a custom Whac-a-Mole...with Mario Lopez moles!). For a brand that put their cash to good use, check out ConkWear.

Started with the dough its founder banked after starring in an AT&T/Napster ad that convinced exactly four people to listen to music on their cellphones, Conk's a line of tees featuring snarkily surrealist, animal-based images, appropriated from said founder's own absurdist photo collages. Just dropped're three new prints: the Mona Lisa, with a politely posed elephant replacing Da Vinci's smirking lady; The Birth Of Venus, now starring a flamingo; and the "Unisorse" -- a half unicorn/half seahorse concoction dreamed up by the aforementioned company founder, who's clearly got a vivid imagination, especially when it comes to spelling words. You can also still snag the three-shirt debut line, all featuring a besuited man's body topped with a zebra, giraffe, or lion head -- resulting in a striking juxtaposition intellectuals will doubtless see as exposing the "workplace as a zoo", and you'll see as another depressing reminder that you don't know how to tie a tie.

Select prints've also found their ways onto hoodies and v-neck sweaters, and 10% of every order goes to your choice of five charities -- another payday that'll go to good use, so long as PETA doesn't lobby for "endangered" status on the North American Slaterus TankTopus.

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Hit the big time at ConkWear.com