Chet Phillips Monkeys Into Austin And our monkeys welcome him

Perhaps the world's only simian-steampunk artist, Dallas native Chet Phillips has just moved to Austin, bringing with him his latest masterwork: a purchasable deck of playing cards illustrated with caricatures of our evolutionary ancestors that will impress and amaze all your prime mates. To celebrate, some of the inhabitants of the Austin Zoo's newly opened Primate Palace have taken time out of their busy dung-flinging schedule to properly welcome their closest cousins amongst Phillips' creations:

Having recently escaped a life of testing psychotropic drugs at an Oregon pharmaceutical lab, Donna the Capuchin (at left) isn't necessarily into respecting authority, but even she can't deny that King Wobbleytop is keeping it tight(s).

A brown, or "true", lemur, Elvis just turned 21 but has yet to have his first drink. When he does, he probably ought to don a helmet similar to Colonel Kerfluffleton's.

Stefania Scarletclot's vampiric tendencies are mirrored in Heckle the marmoset, who instead of fangs has extended lower incisors for digging insects out of trees, a method of sustenance-gathering that explains why she had to leave Radiohead's The Bends tour.

Mabel the Patas bears a striking resemblance to Octavian Hemogoblin the Vampire Slayer. She can also run up to 34mph, so unless you've just moved to Dallas and your name is Yu Darvish, you're not getting any dung on her.