It's no secret that competition can push innovation -- at least it's not anymore, and now other email newsletters are totally going to steal that insightful observation. Damnit! For innovative homewares forged in the fires of a heated rivalry...and then given an adorably cheeky name: I've Got Wood Furniture.

Run by two former Metro State industrial design students who competed in class before deciding to join forces, IGWF "blends old-school woodworking materials with modern technology" to craft eco-friendly utilitarian furniture, but not Unitarian furniture, because no one wants to eat dinner and watch TV on a church pew. To the woody goodies:

Ball Lamp: Made from CO beetle-kill wood, this lamp (avail in diameters of 16'', 24'', and 30'') is actually woven underwater, and "naturally forms into a spherical shape" while drying, unlike you, who only does it while watching Full House reruns until mid-afternoon after a long night.

Scrap Wood Bench: Crafted from the offcut of a flooring project that was set to be burned, this 7.5-footer "looks great with hardwood floors" and is "constructed to look like a solid brick", aka every Shaq free throw ever.

Beetle-Kill Stool/ Table: This minimalist, dual-use piece's Coloradan aesthetic is attained via a "Native American-inspired pattern", so where better to rest your piece/ pipe?

If you're looking to reclaim some wood but aren't currently in the bench market, they've also just released a limited-edition series of 6" rulers, which, just like less badass email newsletters, are perfectly straightedge.