Las Vegas

It's not cheap, but Knockout's grandest package is worth the wad-blowing: roundtrip private jet transpo complete with "buxom Flight Babes", three nights in a Hard Rock VIP room, three private parties featuring the "Knockout" girls (including a pool party w/ bikini contest), and a high stakes tourney in Rock's brand new poker room with the girls there to root you on. The site's so hilariously racy (jet captain cupping Flight Babe's butt), it actually offers a separate link for anyone with a "Jealous or Insecure Wife or Girlfriend" -- too bad we're not posting it.

866.745.7767

City Center's second offering is a 57-story non-gaming hotel and spa where all 1,495 suites come with open floor plans, full luxed out kitchens, city and mountain views, limited edition artwork, and customized mini-bars. The culinary cornerstone's Silk Road, which uses a sculptural partition to vary light flow throughout the day, while the 40,000 sq ft Sky Pool's situated right over the hotel's grand entrance -- don't dive for distance, or your "Jackknife" will become "The Red Carpet".

4455 Paradise Rd; 800.473.7625

Doubled in size to host boxing and MMA along with music, the Joint now hosts 4,000 seats, 700 fixed balcony seats, and 7 VIP suites, all no further than 155 feet from a stage equipped with three mammoth screens animated by 18,000 high-def projectors. Bands from The Killers to The Crue to Paul McCartney will be backed up by a D&B Audiotechnik sound system and a Digidesign Venue Profile 96 channel mixing board -- according to the venue, equipment so powerful, the acts could blow themselves offstage.

3400 Las Vegas Blvd; 800.627.6667

Rhumbar's boosted its tropical retreat of a patio to 4,000 sq ft, accommodating 150 additional guests for the warm-weather chugging of cocktails like the Latin Manhattan (Cruzan Single Barrel Rum stirred with Caribbean spices, lime, falernum liqueur, a dash of bitters, and a splash of Jamaican ginger beer). This weekend, SI Cover Girl Marisa Miller's slated to hang out, when she'll be eternally grateful for having 4,000 sq ft over which to evade you.

3950 Las Vegas Blvd; 877.632.7800

Book a minimum two-nights starting at $89 per night and get a fly-back-free certificate (up to $350), plus $100 bucks off a private cabana and $25 Sand Dollars to blow at an 11-acre beach featuring, three swimming pools, a wave pool, a lazy river, 2,700 tons of real sand, and a jogging track -- which you'd gladly relinquish all $25 of your sand dollars to avoid.