Shut down in March, Bally's sportsbook is reopening August 26th, with a 100-guest VIP lounge, TV screens installed in the backs of plusher seats, larger overhead flatscreens, surprise appearances by high-profile sports figures (oh, God, please let it be Jerry Glanville), and "text-to-win" contests for trips to NFL games, including a grand prize package for the Super Bowl in Miami -- so win or lose, you'll continue your streak of vacationing with old people.

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Room rates start at 45 bucks per night; make a reservation at BallysLasVegas.com