This something-for-everyone blowout boasts free booze (Patron and V2), free music (the classic-rocky Steel Train), and living, breathing horses, all in support of a photo show featuring said horses, motorcycles, and rockers like Ozzy and Ted Nugent -- who declined to attend when told the horses had to be returned alive.

Check out the flier at SixShooterLA.com

50%-and-over discounts on tees, hoodies, hats, etc, from Obey, Mishka, Goorin Bros, and more, as well as a DJ and -- on Saturday -- live hip-hop. There'll also be booze, but you'll have to pay cash for it unless you buy a super-compelling Obey shirt.

More brands on the flier here

Incorporating esoterica like truffle butter, rice, and macadamia nuts, this lactose-tolerant competition features four categories, from the white-bread-based Missionary Position to the anything-goes Karma Sutra. Obviously, this event is organized by a bunch of well-sexed ladies' men.

Sign up for the mailing list to find out the currently-undisclosed location and register to compete at GrilledCheeseInvitational.com

It's one thing to pull this off in the movie Porky's, but to invoke this man in front of a prestigious civic legislature is pure magic.

The insanity begins at :56 at YouTube