Los Angeles

700 S Grand Ave, Downtown; 866.488.9162

This gargantuan upscale Italian market/cafe/eatery boasts white marble floors, a show kitchen, and shelves stocked with specialty ingredients like Australia-imported pear fruit paste and locally handmade Valerie Confections chocolate. The banquette-lined restaurant does fresh fare like thin-crusted fennel sausage pizza and oven-roasted black cod, and the market boasts a deli case with 200+ prepared dishes, like a Brie/apple/watercress panini, osso bucco, garlic-studded pork, and Bibb salad -- with the way you eat, as if there were any other kind.

Thurs 6-10pm at 316 W 2nd St, Downtown

Hit this downtown gallery's opening for free beer & wine, as well as an exhibit of new paintings and older work from old-school LA punk scenester Willie Herrón, including fliers from defunct venues and Super 8 footage of '70s-era street performers, all telling "an invisible history of the city"; appropriately, Kevin Bacon narrates inaudibly.

1743 N Cahuenga, Hollywood

This new club from the Green Door guys in the massive former Ritual/White Lotus space is blessed with two full bars, glass bubble chandeliers, a plant-laden outdoor patio, and a slew of VIP areas, including one with one-way mirrored glass overlooking the dance floor. A small food menu (Kobe sliders, calamari, etc) is available only with bottle service, because only the biggest of ballers deserve the tiniest of burgers.

April 25, at a secret downtown location (revealed on their site on April 20)

For $5, you can be one of 1700 tasters/judges for this annual cheese-oozing competition, deciding who wins in each of three categories: The Missionary Position (bread, butter, and cheese only), The Kama Sutra (basics, plus savory ingredients), or The Honey Pot (dessert-style). For the first time, this year's setting will also include a beer & wine garden, with alcoholic proceeds going to a TBA charity -- hopefully, the Foundation For 1700 Simultaneous Gastric Bypasses.

Available at Moist: 7518 Melrose, Mid-Wilshire; 323.655.5750

This LA-via-Italy jeansery gives extra attention to the backs of its pants, with most variations including intricately sewn, exposed-thread seams and butt-pockets enhanced with the brand's cursive "R" and "V" logos. New models're intro'd each month; the current all-straight-leg drop includes The Michael (subtle, jean-colored stitching), The Noah (which gives the illusion its standard front-crotch stitching has come undone), and the Jason (beige logo on the pockets; heartlessly murders anyone who dares have teenage camp-sex).