Los Angeles

Opens tomorrow, dates through July 26 at Los Angeles State Historic Park: 1245 N Spring St, Downtown

These Burning Man vets're re-descending on downtown, filling a tent 3x bigger than last year's with a steampunk-cum-cabaret answer to Cirque Du Soleil, complete with flamethrower-caliber fire-spitting, corset-tease burlesque, ribbon-aided acrobatic flying, a booze garden with beer/wine/absinthe, and an aftershow dance party with honky-tonky 19-piece band Vaud and the Villains, who earned the second half of their name by using such a dumb pun.

Starting this week, 20+ Pasadena dining establishments're benevolently abolishing corkage fees on Wednesdays; participants range from high-end (The Dining Room at the Langham), to casual (Barn Burner BBQ), to '50s-themed Andy's Coffee House, where Great Balls of Fire will reference your pony of Hot Damn 100.

Tomorrow at the Echoplex: 1154 Glendale Blvd, Echo Park

This '70s-themed drinking-while-rollerskatin' throwdown hits LA for the first time, with DJs cranking retro jams while skaters careen around the Echoplex's wooden floor. If you your friends loved you enough to tease you into throwing out your rollerblades, you can rent four-wheelers, most of which'll randomly contain tickets for gratis Colt 45, and others, athlete's foot.

Only at Kitson: 115 S Robertson Blvd, Beverly Hills

To cash in on the new movie, Kitson's peddling exclusive super-soft 100% cotton tees, including Optimus armed for battle next to the Transformers logo, a 'former getting pwned by a presumably bionic woman wearing a gold bikini and saying "Next", and Megatron under hand-embroidered Japanese, which almost definitely translates to "Virgin".

Sunday at Blvd 16: 10740 Wilshire Blvd, Westwood

Drag dad to this upscale gorgeapalooza, where 35 bones gets the both of you a brunch buffet including homemade corned beef hash & poached eggs, BBQ flank steak, biscuits & maple sausage gravy, and all the beer you can stomach; brews're still being worked out, but they promise "a selection from around the world", so hopefully Red Dog's not a country anymore.