Step One

Set your starting lineup: 1lb chicken wings, 3cups ketchup, 1cup espresso, 1/2cup molasses, 1/2cup soy sauce, plus 1tbsp Worcestershire sauce, 1tsp chili powder, and salt and pepper to taste.

Step Two

Toss your wings with salt and pepper, then push them reeeeeal good into a non-stick pan. Place said pan on pictured fire. Ooooh baby baaaby.

Step Three

Add the ketchup to a mixing bowl. Now pour it from that mixing bowl into an even larger mixing bowl.

Step Four

Stir in a cup of chilled espresso or iced coffee.

Step Five

Soy sauce next.

Step Six

Put the salt, pepper, chili powder, and Worcestershire sauce into classy looking metal containers. Okay, now you can add them to the bowl.

Step Seven

Stir in the molasses 'til your sauce looks like this.

Step Eight

When the wings are almost done, brush BBQ sauce on (yes, you really just made BBQ sauce that easily and yes, that's a paintbrush). Let it burn a little bit.

Step Nine

Now hide them in your pockets. Or on a plate. Your call. And don't forget to check out Jon Bohn's cooking at MilkBoy.

And be sure to check out even more crazy-simple recipes that will make Mr. Little Caesar really jealous, in our national Super Bowl Snacking roundup.