Anoint yourself Tailgate Czar with this 17-inch, totable satellite TV to enjoy the NFL Sunday Ticket football package absolutely anywhere. Or, for even more stomach-churning violence, you can tune it to The Hills.

Mobilize your NFL addiction here

Available in varieties ranging from Honey Bourbon to Thai Coconut Lime, these stick-based tastes flavor your food from the inside, ensuring seasoning throughout, and the most succulent game of no-hands pick-up-sticks you've ever challenged your sister to.

Stick some flavor in your food here

Opened moments ago, STAGR's Web storefront stocks push-the-limit tees sporting skateboarding sumos, possessed-bunny makeout sessions, and the timeless hot-chick-with-a-9mm, all created by rock band poster artists who thankfully burnt out on designing Hoobastank pinups.

Posterize yourself at STAGR.com

Inspired by recent Miss Teen USA follies, this site offers the children of America, South Africa, and the Asian countries a growing cache of mostly tongue-in-cheek maps, notably ones that'll help you: bank cash like Sean Astin (One-Eyed Willie's treasure); learn where to go when the block is dead, yo (A1A Beachfront Avenue); and, of course, avoid tongues in your cheek (registered sex offenders in Fresno).

Get maps for US Americans at MapsForUs.org