Nation

VV's unloading 60+ of their old-school-looking pre-weathered tees, most featuring clever turns of phrase like "Let's Hear It For Sign Language!", "Similes Are Like Metaphors", and "Reverse Psychology Doesn't Work". Oh, yes it does.

Upload your photos/mp3s/vids just once to Oosah, then quickly move them to Flickr, YouTube, Facebook, and Picassa using a breezy drag-and-drop interface -- because the world shouldn't have to wait to see pictures of you hanging with Berry Gordy.

So this Dave guy fused two half-bottles o' sauce together (one tongue-melting, one mild), then rigged up a rotating nozzle-top that clicks into seven progressive hotness mixes; spritz it onto your food, or if you're Dom DeLuise, Binaca-style right into your mouth.

Available in multiple colorways, both the 70s-retro Stiloso and the oversized DJ-issue Grande pump out your tunes with sonic excellence, but also function as cell/iPhone headsets thanks to a discrete mic -- letting you trade flashy bluetoothed loserness for bubble-eared babbling insanity.

Register Mr. Happy (still available!!!) on NYW, the "only authorized site to issue certified wang certificates". If your preferred monk-moniker isn't already snatched up, purchase it, and NYW'll send you official name-ownership papers (just try not to lose the deed to "The House" in a poker game).