While the proliferation of online dating services suggests that millions of people are desperately seeking love, single people tend to be really, really ugly. Find singles who can match your smoldering hotness, with Darwin Dating.
Because even the sexiest people "live in an ugly world", DD's applied that ugly world's natural selection to online dating, using a Hot-or-Not-esque process to weed out uncomely applicants so that the good looking may prevent a future filled with more Charles Darwins. To get on the inside, provide basic info and, more importantly, a picture of your handsomeness, which will then be voted on by site members on a scale from 1 ("chimpanzee") to 5 ("sexy human"); if you've made the (unspecified) cut after a two week voting period, you'll get full-fledged access to a dazzling array of complete narcissists. If you don't make it, it might be because you possess one of DD's verboten flaws, which include saggy boobs, fat rolls, acne, pasty skin, non-symmetrical faces/bodies, mullets/middle parts, wobbly upper arms, disproportionately large ears, webbed toes, perms, and even red hair and freckles, forcing Scotsmen to revert to picking women based on caber-tossing skills.
Of course extraordinary vanity comes with its own dangers, chief among them that your photo may plummet to the very bottom and be posted on DD's special page for the 20 ugliest applicants, finally helping you realize that the reason you're single is because you're actually smolderingly ugly.
Published: November 24, 2008 at 4:00am EST
Be the first to know about the newest restaurants, bars, & events in your hood.