New York

243 E 14th St, between 2nd and 3rd; 212.253.7670

From the Tillman's guy, this retro'd Japo-Danish den (it's about time) plates organic free range Yakitori, pork, and Kobe beef dishes, e.g., tsukune ume shiso (minced chicken w/ sour plum sauce), bara lemon shiso (Berkshire black hog belly), and kalbi (wagyu short rib). Besides gin/vodka/tequila and plumwine concoctions, cocktails mostly use traditional sakes/shochus like Iichiko, Zuisen, and Junmai Daiginjo-shu -- recall it at a later date by saying "Daiginjo was it's name, oh".

in the sculpture garden at 590 Madison Ave, at 56th; 212.355.2217

The first stateside location from an int'l cheese concern, Obika's a svelte circular bar pushing two types of water-buffalo-milk mozzarella (sweet from Paestum in Italy's Campania region; creamy from Vermont) in several light dishes, e.g., wild smoked salmon w/ grilled zucchini, and cherry organic tomatoes w/ light basil pesto. Obika's also serving antipasti (mortadella w/ pistachios, porchetta and fig marmalade,...), plus an extensive Italian wine selection, from reds like the Piedmont's Nebbiolo d'Alba, to whites like Sicily's Nozze d'Oro -- or "Golden Wedding", a treat typically reserved for only the biggest R. Kelly fans.

Opening reception 6:30-8:30pm Thurs at Van de Weghe Fine Art: 521 W 23rd St, between 10th and 11th; 212.929.6633

Just in time for Oktoberfest, grab gratis Bud/Bud Light at famous-people-photog Kevin Lynch's four-year UFC retrospective: bloody before-/after- UFC portraits, in-ring action shots of fighters like Forrest Griffin & Dave Menne, plus the chance to meet Chuck Liddell, the most terrifying man to ever dab his mouth with an art gallery cocktail napkin.

Oct 3rd thru 29th with booking by Oct 15th

The Caribbean's largest resort's offering a discount package to keep the summer going: 21% off 4-days/3-nights at Atlantis plus VIP access to next-door-neighbor The Cove, including free admission to the normally off-limits Cain adult pool complex (with poolside gambling) and Aura nightclub, and a 50-girl bikini challenge hosted by Playmate Kendra Wilkinson (The Girls Next Door, pictured). Also included: free round trip town car service between Atlantis and The Cove and a gratis in-room bottle of Patron Silver Tequila, for drinking away your sorrow over not staying at The Cove.

A hilariously NSFW version of the lobotomized cats meme, Burger displays LOLspeak-captioned pics sourced from all manner of p*** genres. Remember, whether you're thrilling to "mah loadz, I DROPZ THEM!" or "I M N UR LABS HUMPIN UR SCIENCE", it's not about perversion. It's about being internet savvy.