If tomorrow, God forbid, you wake up bound and gagged on a putt-putt course, you'd have no idea where you were: the windmills suggest Holland, the pagodas China, and the volcanoes Krakatoa, or possibly Mount Saint Helens. For mini-golf true to its home, hit The Putting Lot, opening Saturday.

Intricately engineered by several prominent teams of local architects, urban planners, and design studios, Lot's an eco-minded, NY-themed mini-golfplex, erected over the rubble of a vacant lot in scenic Bushwick, and offering nine-hole rounds for a five-spot -- heretofore the Bushwick Bill. Constructed entirely from salvaged and repurposed materials (chicken wire, sedan doors, Moon Patrol stand-up arcade), the holes range from a full-sized bodega façade with a video-game cabinet putt-through ("The Bushwick Art Mart"), to an industrial concrete tower ("The Reservoir"), to a raised platform surrounded by a wading pool called "Are You Wet Yet?" -- echoing the creators' earlier project, the former Hotel QT, host of Midtown's only lobby-bar swimming pool, where you can float shaded from the judging eyes of God/Google Earth. Other holes are more abstractly laid out/overtly high-minded; Bklyn-based PLOT describes theirs as "an analogous representation of the frustrating relationship between emerging environmental building technologies and standard industrial practices" -- explain that to your foursome, and they'll be aiming for your clown mouth.

Because mini-golf's strenuous, Lot'll also serve up a light bill of snacking fare, like packaged baked goods from local providers, and chocolate made in Williamsburg (a cocoa tree grows in Brooklyn?). The course will only be open during summer, after which it'll revert to a debris-strewn lot -- the very edifice that, no matter where they encountered it, would trick the disoriented into thinking they were in Bushwick.

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Get all the eco-deets at ThePuttingLot.org