Crumb on Parchment Michelle Bernstein's mom is awesome

There's really nothing quite like food made by Mom, although over the years, you've gotten pretty darn good at heating up Toaster Strudels yourself, you clever boy. Proving food made by other people's moms can be pretty good too: Crumb on Parchment.

Open now in the atrium of the 3930 Building, Crumb's a mid-century Cape Code-inspired cafe blessing you with all manner of hearty eats and baked goods whipped up daily by owner Michelle (Sra. Martinez) Bernstein's mom, and offering impossible-to-find Design District convenience, like maybe the only ATM around, a newspaper/mag rack with the NY Times, Economist, etc., and even cigarettes, which for the area, is pretty damn Kool. Amidst mismatched vintage furniture and coolly shabby cupboards are the made-daily cookies, croissants, cakes (German choc w/ roasted walnuts, Mom's specialty coconut), muffins (cranberry-orange, molasses bran), and pastries like strawberry rhubarb tarts and gigantic chewy granola bars, all displayed on old-school ceramic pedestals and cake stands, also how Kirstie Alley impresses everyone at AEPie parties. Things also swing savory with Manchego and Serrano scones, a breakfast sandwich (served 'til 5p) with kale, shallots, chicken sausage, and melted cheddar on challah, and "Warm 'n Messy Hot Sandwiches" like pulled rotisserie chicken, caramelized onions, goat cheese, arugula, and roasted pears on crusty bread, which the clown makes tons of thanks to The Simpsons being syndicated.

Waitresses clad in Leave It To Beaver-style aprons'll also bring you an array of drinks, from teas served in the apothecary glasses with silver spigots, to huge glasses of milk to go with your cake, to ice-filled tin buckets of Pacifico, because while food made by Mom is fantastic, the one thing she can't make is beer, unless your mom's the St. Pauli Girl, a fact you'd be drinking to forget.