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The cutesieness of typical e-cards forces you into sentiments you'd never care to express -- like affection, or caring. Send an e-card that speaks your salty language, with Rattlebox.

Rattlebox is a Van Nuys-based operation that offers semi-personalized video greetings based on both tweaked '50s film footage and YouTube-like originals -- some involving babies-and-bunnies, but most featuring content you wouldn't show a baby or bunny. Edgy for all seasons:Happy Birthday: Everything from a spastic, mumbling child "rapper" to a clip of a bachelor party that ends with a stripper using her buttocks to pluck a dollar out of a goateed man's mouth (is that you down there, Milfhunter?). Anniversary: Rattle uses Ozzie-and-Harriet-esque clips for sentiments both touching (a date that extends into the night) and touching (a midlife plea for anal sex). It's 4:20!: 10 weedy videos that range from the flirtatious (an animated joint insisting "Why don't you pick me up and smoke me sometime!") to the unwarranted (hallucinatory zombies warning that "Maybe it's time to lay off the pipe").For Sunday, RB's got plenty of Father's Day options, highlighted by a "Thanks for the DNA" card accompanied by vid of swimming sperm -- a sentiment your dad expressed several decades ago, but often wishes he hadn't.

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Check out the greetings at Rattlebox.com