Recess

Ask any kid what his favorite class is and he'll tell you "recess", unless he's fat. Now giving it to you in club form, Recess.

Nestled in the entrance to the parking garage at the Ritz East, Recess has taken over the space last occupied by Club 125, transforming the 240-capacity room into an open-floor lounge with two glass-tiled, granite-topped bars, an elevated corner bottle service zone, and walls lined with black leather banquettes designed to also accommodate asses on a raised back ledge, all underneath four disco balls casting rays on phrase-scrawled blackboards, like a clubby playground where all the kids go home and bang. Along with an elevated DJ booth hooked up to big-box JBL floor speakers that'll act as mini-stages for dancers, and a raised, enclosed room with a frosted glass window for "Shadowbox" dancers, the decor centerpiece is a b&w 15' x 8' mural depicting a Renaissance couple imbibing as peasants enviously peek in from the side; two bars pour top-shelf hooch, and bottle service is available throughout the entire joint, with choices on LED-backed menus that light up when opened, like that recess-hating fat kid's face when the lid comes off the Munchkins box. Technically a "social club", it's open Thurs-Sun and offers annual memberships for $20 (or $75 for VIP=invites to private parties), which give cardholders free admission, as well as a rare opportunity to drink till 3:30 in Philly thanks to an after-hours license, ensuring you'll get shot down by a whole new shift's worth of waitresses at Little Pete's.

Within the month, they'll be installing a touchscreen computer in the elevated lounge so guests can satiate their Facebook/Twitter cravings. Tonight's opening party features Kanye West's ones-and-twos man DJ Aktive -- also the nickname given to Donald Jackson back in grade school, by the kids who used their recess time to study up on sarcasm.