San Francisco

Local artiste JLai gets off on painting unconventional, oil-on-canvas self-portraits of herself getting nice with US commanders-in-chief in chronological order. So far, highlights include her getting groped by John Adams, suffocated by Millard Fillmore, and strapping one on to take James Buchanan from behind -- proving that his oft-mocked presidency was simply the result of being unable to sit down and get to work.

Available at Carrots; 843 Montgomery St, near Pacific; Financial District; 415.834.9040

Printed on ridiculously soft, semi-sheer burnout blanks, the spring collection from SF-based SGR's all black-on-white imagery, like an old school camera, an ornately engraved Derringer pistol, a racing bicyclist, and a series of variously sized bold-yet-faded circles that'll hopefully distract people from your own bold-yet-pointy circles.

42 Columbus Ave, at Jackson; Financial District; 415.421.2540

The new-ish, open 'til 2:30am on weekends FiDi burgers-'n'-more joint's added a delectable dinner menu that runs from a pappardelle carbonara, to a grilled Niman Ranch pork loin w/ apple chutney & house potatoes, to pan-seared chicken piccata w/ white wine & capers -- tons of sans-bun action, in case you've had your fill of them up on Broadway already.

Pop in your home/work addresses and your whip's make/model/year, and BillShrink will analyze your route -- weighing gas stations' prices against the "true cost" of detouring to them given your mileage -- to find you the cheapest, most convenient place to fill up, even though you know you're just gonna go to the place with taquitos.

Menlo Park's Jaxtr has devised a way for you to call internationally (to 50+ countries) from your cell totally free. Just dial a pre-set local number, input your long-distance-buddy's digits when prompted, and s/he'll be texted a local-to-them callback number -- way to invent Beeper 2.0, Jaxtr.