Bad Monkey Bistro (now closed) Local bistro menu is filled with variety and did we mention drinks?

They say you can't have everything, but those people clearly haven't met Wong Foo -- dude hooked Julie Newmar up! For a bar from two dudes who've also clearly met Wong Foo: Bad Monkey Bistro.

Taking its name from the phrase one of the owners used to chide a friend for swearing while they played video games, BMB's got a little bit of everything: a piano lounge, a sports bar, and a resto serving-up a wide-ranging menu of steakhouse-style fare, all from a low-slung converted office building that brings a grand piano fitted with bar stools, and boasts a separate fire-placed lounge, and a game room that's been jungled up with bamboo and monkeys made of wood, so don't even think about spanking it. Dinner options range from apps (poblano & avocado salsa/root chip Bourbon Street Steak), to pasta (a coppa/prosciutto/sopressata/salumi/roasted garlic linguini in cream sauce called Da Vinci), to seafood like an artichoke heart/caramelized onions pan seared Salmon Baby, and a sauteed rock lobster, shrimp, and salmon dish called "Where's Nemo?", also the name of an extremely boring and brief version of the Disney classic. For smaller-plate action at the bar, they've got bacon & white cheddar Cheese Fries, deep fried Crab Lollipops w/ tarter, and battered Coconut Shrimp served w/ creole red grapefruit marmalade, which, unlike Creole Lady Marmalade, doesn't stink.

BMB boasts an equally sprawling lunch menu, plus signature 'tails behind the bar like the grape vodka/curacao/fresh sour Grape Ape, and the Rain Forest w/ raspberry stoli & X-Rated Liqueur, which is proof you can't have everything, since it'd have two more Xs. And Vin Diesel. In drag.