Zai Outerwear The luxe Swiss ski-maker takes on apparel

Because full-body ski suits technical enough to survive a hot tub shouldn't look like they came from a time machine, the Swiss concern known for ultra-sick handmade skis (that's Zai, you fool) has debuted a line of equally amazing ski-coutrements that combine maximum functionality with "absolute liberty", so Ron Paul can be his normal daffy self whilst throwing one.

For your bod, the "Cassacca" jacket/snowpant getup comes in three understated colorways, features reinforced ankles & shoulders, and's cut from water-repelling cashmere, wool, and elastane blended by none other than Loro Piana, who've imbued it with their "Storm" system to insulate and protect you from hot African witch-priestesses who control the elements.

Their goggles boast an "all-round" ventilation system, and reflective UV lenses that auto-adapt to light intensity, while titanium sunglasses sport polycarb lenses that're both fog-free and break-proof, unlike the rest of you while totally yard sale-ing down the slopes.

And, to protect your most valuable asset, there's a luxurious jock strap carbon fiber helmet with a soft leather chinstrap/ear protectors, while keeping it cozy're merino wool/fleece beanies, all hand-knit and signed by elderly ladies living in a Swiss retirement home, sadly meaning their only hope of regaining absolute liberty is via time machine.