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Because walking a mile in another man's shoes inevitably leads to...ugh...understanding him, The Chicago School of Shoemaking will teach you the lost art of making your own damn kicks, all under the guidance of a 35yr-experienced master cobbler, who must be a real peach.

Beginner classes include two days of instruction with no more than four students, all of whom will make a basic pair of leather tie shoes, using provided patterns to cut the uppers, soles, and midsoles before hand-stitching/gluing them together, at which point you'll walk away with fresh shoes and the ability to resole them once you get in a kick fight with Run-D.M.C. and discover they actually are tougher than leather.

For those who want to get really serious there are more advanced courses like Intermediate Shoemaking, which branches out into different styles (Cordoba, Prague); seasonally appropriate bootmaking; and, soon, sandals, which hopefully come with an all-inclusive food and drinks package.

Those interested in actually pursuing a cobbling career are kind of weird, and can also take a course on the business end of things, as unfortunately being successful requires...ugh...understanding stuff.

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They also do straight-up leatherworking classes. Learn more at ChicagoSchoolOfShoemaking.com.