Own Chubbies

From some Bay Area lads who live by the creed "skies out thighs out" even in frigid weather, this new line of uber-truncated winter shorts is made from robust fabrics, like the thick cotton, red "Bloodhounds", the blue corduroy "Cordwood Petes", and the tan corduroy "Bunyans" named after the famed figure whose leg hair was "so bounteous as to make pants completely unnecessary."