The Laundry Cafe Cleaning clothes just got awesome

Like Master P once said, "life ain't nothing but britches & hosiery". Helping you masterfully handle both of those with maybe the coolest clothes-cleaning operation you've ever seen: The Laundry Cafe. A welcome rehash of the dark, damp laundromat, 140 washer/dryer-equipped TLC's a 'mat o' the future, with amenities up the ass like Netflix-equipped flatscreens, arcades, and LED-lit, windowed detergent machines… so, you can watch your soaps. It's a pretty big change, and you've probably got some frequently asked questions, which's great because we've got answers:

I'm fine with paying to wash, but I absolutely refuse to pay for drying.
You're good, because each wash cycle actually nets you free drying time -- no strings/clotheslines attached.

Also, my feet hurt, but I have a strong aversion to typically rigid laundromat seating.
Your melamine fears are quelled, as you'll find the venue chock-full of contemporary pub-height tables & chairs, plus plenty of contoured benches.

I'm bored and don't want to watch all these Netflix-equipped flatscreens.
Luckily there's also a row of vintage arcade games (Ms. Pac-Man!!) and free WiFi for browsing RedTube laundry tips.

I'd like to hear about a feature via a terrible segue.
Not a problem. Beans are the reason you're washing your whites in hot water, so you should enjoy the Starbucks station in the corner for plenty of brews.

The concept of bringing a WiFi-enabled device in with my laundry confuses & enrages me.
Maybe cut back on the Starbucks, chill out in one of the massage chairs (!), then rent one of the numerous 'mat-provided desktops, where you can browse YouJizz laundry tips for just a buck an hour.

I've got $10, a load of lights, a load of darks, and 4hrs to kill.
Wash your tees, grab a cup of coffee, set a Galaga high score, then wear your boxers inside out next week -- a move that's totally worth it, even if it makes 'em say Uhhhh!