Summer Splash 2012 Feel that? Your excitement's water just broke.

A wise, very handsome, by all accounts over-satisfying in bed e-newsletter once said "Trips to Vegas are unquestionably awesome, but they come with the annoyance of figuring a way to weasel into the clubs without the very girls you're desperately trying to get into the club to meet, so you can immediately leave the club". But that was in 2010, and 2012's version of Summer Splash -- the four-day party that hits all of Sin City's hottest clubs and leaves none of the details to you -- is bigger and better than ever. With one of their two weekend bashes already fully booked, be sure to sign up immediately if any of the following, hilariously misleading scenarios appeals to you:

Spending 24hrs finding the path to spiritual enlightenment... assuming you can even make the walk to The Venetian's TAO Nightclub after spending all of Day One in a cabana at TAO Beach.

Having your game totally salted... in one of Wet Republic's two enormous salt pools, which is where you'll spend Day Two before heading to Marquee to wander between three different, separately DJ'd rooms, probably salting your own game.

Needing serious help with your drinking problem... because your problem is that you aren't holding a drink, and the Rehab pool party at the Hard Rock will cure what ails you during Day Three, then send you off to be confused by the pulsating lights and music at 1OAK.

Not straying too far from your room... as you won't have to on Day Four, thanks to the new Marquee Day Club being located where you're staying (The Cosmopolitan). You will, however, have to leave the premises at night to hit up Lavo, but it's worth the effort considering after all this partying you're going to be very handsome, wise, and over-satisfying in bed.