Traditionally, the ultimate status symbol of the rich was to invite an artist into their home to paint custom art of revered things like Greek gods, galloping horses, and less-fat versions of themselves. Pretend you're loaded, with glorious custom art from lovely Russian damsel, Anna Gromova.
Having recently made the standard Moscow-to-ATL relocation, Anna's a 24-year-old, furiously trained, easy-on-the-eyes artist who creates original paintings and personal portraits, and will even come to your house and bless it with a custom mural, so you can suggest she "perestroika the cat", then impatiently wait for her to acknowledge your worldliness. Murals start as low as $200 for 3ft-tall jobs she'll take as little as an hour to slap on walls, ceilings, and even kitchen tile, using oil, watercolor, pastel, acrylic, and graphite -- tools she's used in the past to realize island views, architectural renditions, and city skylines; just send her an email with your preferred size, ideas, and reference photos, and she'll quote a price and get started (almost as awesome as the last similar offer, when you got to meet Chris Hansen). If your landlord hates art on his walls, you can commission Anna to paint an original or dupe an existing piece on canvas; she's also plenty happy to take your money for already-completed works, like "Demon", featuring a sexy, golden succubus with a long, clawed wing inside a misty background of circles and curves, or "Aries", a profile view of a Cyclops chick with brown, red, yellow, and black rectangles swirling around curling horns -- buy it, and you'll be so pleased, you'll say "ram, bam, thank you ma'am."
AG will also meet up and sketch a charcoal portrait of you or anyone else for as low as $50; oil paintings get pricier depending on size -- which means, seeing as you're still not loaded, you could also save on food money by actually becoming a less-fat version of yourself.