Life would rule if things you normally have to seek would just come to you, namely, all those people hiding in the...CLOSET! Nope. Maybe the...GARAGE! Nope! Dammit, are you guys just back at Mikey's house playing Paperboy again? Brilliantly bringing you not just stogies, but the whole damn smokers' lounge, Lashes and MustASHES.
Though incapable of grooming your lip/eyelid hairs, L&M does something else you've awaited for far too long: deliver a tricked-out cigar lounge anyplace you demand, inside a silver '86 Airstream motorhome with brown leather limo seating, cocktail tables with porcelain ashtrays, and three DirecTV-equipped flat screens, constructed by an entrepreneur calling herself "Cigarfoxy", who refuses to say if she's still beefing with "CigarLilkim". The "Land Yacht" has a commercial-grade air filtering system and a humidor holding up to 1,500 'gars ($10-$40), from smaller, mild puffs like the sweet, Connecticut Shade-wrapped Acid Blondie, to mediums such as the rare 1964 Padron Anniversary, to full-bodieds like the newly released Berger & Argenti, which boasts a 64-gauge diameter -- which, if you multiply by Pi, will result in
the circumference of a circle of people who won't talk to you. You can extend beyond the trailer with the Veranda, an indoor/outdoor two-tent arrangement that can accommodate 50-75 smokers with leather furnishings and heating units; they can also supply your choice of sauce (Scotch, brandy, Cognac), a staff of lovely hostesses, and music ranging from soft jazz to Jay-Z, because they know you just love blowing Money/Cash/"O"s.
Foxy's planning to add an additional Land Yacht to the fleet by the beginning of 2011, and before that, install a video game console in the current ride, making it the perfect place to hide out and play Kid Chameleon as that sap kid checks the...DRYER! Nope! Damn, these guys are awesome at hiding places!